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Monday 30 November 2015

Extra-marital Affairs - Why?

Extramarital affairs are relationships outside of marriage where an illicit romantic or sexual relationship or a romantic friendship or passionate attachment occurs. A major reason for affairs is 'familiarity may or may not breed contempt, but it does breed boredom and careless disregard of partners.

Technology gives us easy access and a fair bitof privacy and anonymity. With this, striking a friendship and building it to a crescendo was never easier. And then, just one step out of the virtual in to the real world, and in the first flush of love chemicals, an extra-martial affair is born.


  • There can obviously not be any one reason that leads people in to affairs. But research shows that the two biggest reasons for men are sex and attention, while women are mostly looking for emotional validation and a cure for loneliness.

  • Being appreciated is a deep need of both sexes, one that is ignored as couples grow apart. Men miss emotional succor and love as much as women do in a relationship. Men wish to be admired for their intellect and power and their organizational capabilities. Women, on the other hand, need male attention to feel sexy and desirable, for their own self-esteem.

  • A deep connect with another helps validate your existence as an attractive and coveted individual, giving a boost to an ego battered by life's daily grind. The need is not always sexual. It is emotional too.

  • Strangely, spouse hesitate to cater to each other's emotional needs, seeing it as a weakness that could be exploited. They also hesitate to open with each other, treating marriage more as a battleground.

  • Interaction with your love interest offer a comforting respite - you can be yourself and know that you are appreciated. The stakes in this relationship are not high, so you let down your guard more comfortably.

  • Other sensation-seeking factors leading to flings are curiosity and the fear of missing out.

  • According to a research, 77% of cheating men have friends who have cheated too. Available opportunity and the fear of missing out push many in to flings they had no other reason to seek.

  • Apart from boredom and curiosity, two contemporary life motivators for flings are - 'revenge sex' as a relationship for affairs, when one indulges after he or she has been cheated by a partner.

  • Source : It's Your Life: Best of O- zone .
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